I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
