ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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