She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
