how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
