Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
