I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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