would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
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he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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