apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize