I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Your cock deserves a montage
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .