Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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