so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize