C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
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But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
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I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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