To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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