You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize