just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
We were destined to go to rehab together
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
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