im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
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I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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