Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
