i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
