Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
