its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
