the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I don't deserve a penis
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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