Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
