I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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