he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
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