its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
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