You made me cry and you don't even care
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
