yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
