she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
