idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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