you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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