dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
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I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
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I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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