I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
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