Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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