remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Randomize
