It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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