no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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