Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
