Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
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Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
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There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
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