Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
