remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
