I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
