i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize