My girlfriend figured out who you are.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
