Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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