we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
