i think my tv is drunk
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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