Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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