She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
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my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
So vagazzling was a success
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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