i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
