I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Randomize
