Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again

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(212): View more from New York

I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"

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(518): View more from New York

I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.

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(734): View more from Michigan

It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free

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(248): View more from Michigan

I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.

(1-248): View more from Michigan

I think we should measure in "bathtubs"

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!

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(502): View more from Kentucky

My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.

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(894): View more from

I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..

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