THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
